Sometimes I get happy for no apparant reason. And then its like I’m so happy that I fall in love with everything I see. I’ve been known to spend so much time petting dogs that owners will come out of thier house and yell at me, “Stop petting our dog! You’re freaking us out!” So then I have walk down the street and pet some other dog.
When I get happy like this, I go for walks and comune with nature. Once I’m done petting the dogs and smelling the dirt and stuff I inevitably end up out in the back fields. I’ll be laying there staring at the sun… the glorious bright orb that nourishes all. Of course a mans fancy enivitably takes a hard left and turns to thoughts of copulation. Yes, I’ll say it. I want to fuck the sun.
Then comes the sadness and… I just want to fuck the sun and I cannot. So I return home dejected.
I don’t need this bullshit. I’m gonna watch TV until I forget all my sorrows. Of course every fucking commercial has the fucking sun in it, that little trollop. She’s just shining her love down on dog shit and Toyota’s alike, just giving it away.
So I fool around on the internet, have a couple drinks, and I feel happy again. I feel like going for a walk, and its night time, so I don’t have to worry about the sun taunting me.
Ah the cool night air… but what joy is this? What subtle lunar glow, so quiet and inviting. How you whisper through trees to me. Tell me my dear, this Friday, do you have dinner plans?